Ideas, Emotions and Egoic Attitudes

In the second chapter of the 'Big Book' of Alcoholic Anonymous we read that "the main problem of the alcoholic centers in the mind rather in his body." If it were not so, if the alcoholic addict only suffered from a physical craving for more alcohol once he or she begins to drink, not drinking would be the full solution to the addiction. But we know that he or she also, and more importantly, suffers from an obsession of the mind when not drinking. Thus, there is a need for a psychic solution that is more than mere abstinence. The Twelve Steps work because, if taken effectively, they provoke "an entire psychic change" that relieves the obsessive nature of the alcoholic mind.

In retelling Carl Jung's description of the "vital spiritual experiences" that were then known to periodically relieve alcoholism, the renowned psychologist reportedly observed: "Ideas, emotions and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them."

The "ideas" and "emotions" Jung describes are the thoughts and feelings experienced in the alcoholic addict's state of acute self-consciousness, the thoughts and feelings he or she drinks to escape from. "Attitude," on the other hand, is his or her "usual or habitual mode (or way) of thinking." Alcoholic addiction is thus, primarily a problem of self-consciousness, i.e., the existential problem of the human ego.

From this perspective, "ideas" are the fundamental thought content of the ego, "emotions" are the physiological and emotional response to this content, and "attitude" is the habitual identification of the alcoholic addict with the incessant stream of self-conscious, egoic thinking - a "painful inner dialogue" that most individuals (alcoholic and non-alcoholic) take to be "who" they are.

Steps Four, Five, Eight, Nine and Ten are designed to identify what the recurrent thoughts and painful memories of the alcoholic addict are. The sentiments, fears and desires of the ego are identified, and the alcoholic addict soberly faces, perhaps for the first time, what the predominant themes that make up his or her internal life are. Restitution is made for harms caused to others so that the sting is taken out of those thoughts, and an ongoing moral inventory is undertaken to identify egoic thinking and actions.

Steps Three, Six, Seven and Eleven, in their turn, are designed to allow the alcoholic addict to experience those areas of the psyche that lie beneath, but which were formerly obscured by, his or her ordinary self-conscious, egoic thinking. They allow the spiritual dimension of the alcoholic addict's soul to express itself. These are the "new conceptions and motives" that begin to dominate the alcoholic addict in recovery. Suddenly a newly found state of higher consciousness and being - a state of consciousness and being that was lost as the alcoholic addict became almost wholly self-conscious - begins to emerge.

Awareness of the content, feel and incessant nature of the ego, together with an ever growing experience of higher consciousness, is thus the key to kindling a spiritual awakening which will relieve alcoholic thinking. "With few exceptions," we read in the Spiritual Experience appendix to the 'Big Book,' "our members find that they have tapped an unsuspected inner resource which they presently identify with their own conception of a Power greater than themselves." More religious members call it "God-consciousness," a part of our Being wholly separate from the ego and which provides the comfort and ease we sought in alcohol and/or drugs.

On Resentment and Forgiveness

Resentments, we are reminded over and over, are the number one "killers" of alcoholic addicts. But just what are resentments? The word, itself, comes from the Latin sentiere meaning "to feel." So, quite literally, resentment (which in medieval English was  resentiment) means "to feel again." We think about past events over which we are still upset, rub our supposed 'wounds' raw, and then act on the basis of the resulting feelings.

Thus, the process seems to be "re-think --> re-feel --> re-act." And the usual reaction? Far too often, the reaction of the alcoholic addict is to drink or use again, proving yet again the truth of the Chinese proverb: "Anger is a toxic poison, that corrodes the vessel that contains it from the inside out." "The problem of the alcoholic," remember,"centers in the mind."

So how do we do deal with resentments? Listing the resentments by name, writing down the cause of the resentment, and how it affects us, is a start. We then look rigorously and honestly about what part, if any, we played in the circumstances that set the whole train of wronged emotions in play. In most cases we find that we have played a part, and where we have wronged that individual we forgive and make amends where where that is possible. But what about the deeply held resentments where,quite honestly, we played no part?

The resulting thoughts and simmering anger surrounding circumstances in which we were victimized are just as dangerous and perhaps more so than the instances where we played an active role. Requiring a one-sided true forgiveness, these instances may offer us the greatest opportunites for spiritual growth that there are. Mark Twain remarked, "Forgiveness is the scent the violet leaves on the heel of the boot that crushed it." But just how do we get there? Perhaps the key is in recognizing that the other person, though his or her wrong actions may vary in kind from ours, is nonetheless just like us - human, fallible and thus prone to all the same soul sickness that we are.

The Roman Emperor and stoic philosopher, Marcus Aurelius advised in his Meditations

"Begin each day by telling yourself: Today I shall be meeting with interference, ingratitude, insolence, disloyalty, ill-will and selfishness - all of them due to the offender's ignorance of what is good and evil. But for my part I have long perceived the nature of Good and its nobility, the nature of evil and its meanness, and also the nature of the culprit himself who is my brother (not in the physical sense, but as a fellow-creature similarly endowed with Reason and a share of the Divine); therefore none of these things can injure me, for nobody can implicate me in what is degrading. Neither can I be angry with my brother or fall foul of him, for he and I were born to work together, like a man's two hands, feet or eyelids, or like the upper and lower rows of his teeth. To obstruct each other is against Nature's law - and what is irritation or aversion but a form of obstruction?"

More simply put, in the Lord's Prayer we are advised to ask God to "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. The operative word being "as" in this instance. Thus, so long as our thinking returns to the one-sided wrongs that have been done to us, we can dedicate those thoughts to our Higher Power, recognize our own continuing defects of character, and ask to be relieved of the anger that still resides within us. When true forgiveness comes - as it will if it is sought - we will seldom if ever think of those past injustices, usually only in those instances when sharing such wrongs will help someone struggling with wrongs of a similar nature.

Expectations, Anger and Resentments

Anger and fear - in fact all my character defects - seem to be inversely proportional to the expectations I have for myself, for others, and for life in general. In this, I do not think I am alone.

My egoic thinking has constant expectations about how circumstances should and will unfold, despite a lifetime of experience to the contrary; and my self-centered, egoic thoughts about what I am convinced is happening, or is about to happen, give rise to the emotional upheavals characteristic of my defects of character. Thus it is the thoughts of the ego that lead to the feelings of restlessness, irritability and discontent that characterize the alcoholic addict in the throes of his or her disease.

It is precisely to the extent that I continue to identify with my ego, or smaller "self," and thereby continue to harbour such expectations, that I suffer. And if such thinking persists over time, fears grow into phobias, desires grow into entitlements, and anger turns into seething resentments. If I am to be free, I must be free of this selfish, self-centered egoic thinking that is the root of all my problems.

But how is such a shift in the focus of my thinking to come about? First, by truly admitting that life is unmanagable by any individual. Second, by truly turning my will and life over to the care of God, and leaving it there. And, third, by accepting that life is unfolding exactly the way in which it is. For, as the emperor-philosopher Marcus Aurelius observed: "To argue with what is is insanity; and yet, the thoughtless can seldom refrain from doing so."

It is precisely at this point that the well-known passage on "acceptance" is invaluable.

"(A)cceptance," we read, "is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes."

[Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th ed., p. 417.]

Acceptance of life on life's terms is thus directly proportional to my serenity and peace of mind, just as my expectations are inversely proportional to my egoic, self-centered malaise. Therefore, the old question arises: "Do I want to be right, or do I want to be happy?" What will I strive for acceptance, or the fulfillment of my expectations?

The answer should be clear to anyone who has long suffered the unchecked turmoil of his or her character defects. Acceptance, brings the freedom, hope and love which is the grace of God; expectations breed the anger and despair which is "the bondage of self."

Unlearning Old Ideas and Attitudes

One of the unique, paradoxical aspects of Alcoholics Anonymous (and its sister organizations) is "the reversal of form that A.A.'s educational process takes." As one wizened old-timer demonstrated to me - undoubtedly paraphrasing the "Member's Eye View" pamphlet - there is nothing to learn in A.A., it is a process of unlearning; particularly unlearning our old "ideas, emotions and attitudes" so that new "conceptions and motives" can arise to take their place.

The author of "A Member's Eye View," undoubtedly one of A.A's most helpful pamphlets, puts it this way:

"The newcomer to A.A. is asked, not so much to learn new values, as to unlearn those he comes in with; not so much to adopt new goals, as to abandon old ones."

"To my mind," he notes, "one of the most significant sentences in the entire book "Alcoholics Anonymous" is this: "Some of us tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely." The rigidity with which even some nondrinking alcoholics will cling to the opinions, beliefs, and convictions they had upon entering A.A. is well-nigh incredible."

"One of the major objectives of A.A. therapy," he points out, "is to help the alcoholic finally recognize these ideas and become willing to relinquish his death grip on them."

It was Albert Einstein who famously said that "we cannot solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them." The newcomer to A.A. is unlikely to stay clean and sober for long unless she is able to find some relief from the punishing self-centered, ego-centric thinking that is the root problem of her alcoholic addiction. It is therefore incumbent upon us to help him or her recognize egoic thinking by sharing our stories about what it was like, what happened, and what it is like now, emphasizing the changes we have experienced mentally and emotionally as we worked the Steps, and perhaps reserving how we have changed spiritually until he or she is convinced we know what we are talking about. Not all alcoholic addicts necessarily drink the same, but certainly they think the same.

The great psychologist, Carl Jung, in explaining to Rolland H. the nature of the spiritual awakening that had periodically worked to relieve the sufferer of his alcoholism, observed:

"Here and there once in a while, alcoholics have had what are called vital spiritual experiences. To me these occurrences are phenomena. They appear to be in the nature of huge emotional displacements and rearrangements. Ideas, emotions and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them."

[Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 27.]

Now, however, we know that not all such awakenings need be sudden and overwhelming, that they can, in fact, be what William James called awakenings "of the educational variety." Therefore, first and foremost, it is necessary for us to allow the newcomer an opportunity to identify with us, to allow him or her to relate to the way in which we drank, thought and suffered, and then, and only then, to present him or her with the spiritual solution we have found to our drinking (and thinking) problem. After all, "As a man thinketh, so he is."

Letting Go of Anger and Emotional Disturbances

"It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us. If somebody hurts us and we are sore, we are in the wrong also. But are there no exceptions to this rule? what about "justifiable" anger? If somebody cheats us, aren't we entitled to be mad? Can't we be properly anger with self-righteous folk? For us of A.A. these are dangerous exceptions. We have found that justified anger ought to be left to those better qualified to handle it."

-- The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, page 90 --

Why this "spiritual axiom?" Is it not because anger, and particularly "justified" anger, is inimical to our spiritual health and is always poised to delver us back into "the bondage of self" which lies at the root of our problem?

Each time we are "disturbed" - whether by anger, greed, jealousy lust, or some other emotion - it is a sure sign that we have a Step One problem; that is, we are right in there, again, trying to manage our lives (and the people in our lives) in a futile search for self-satisfaction and ego-gratification. In the famous passage on acceptance (at page 417 of the 'Big Book' of Alcoholics Anonymous), we read that:

"When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake." (Emphasis added.)

Notice that in both these passages we are talking of being "disturbed."  Identifying and recognizing when, in fact, we are disturbed is thus the key to dealing with an ever-varying world that is beyond our capacity (or calling) to manage and control. The solution to this Step One problem thus lies in the renewed application of Step Three. When we realize that we are disturbed, we need to act on our decision "to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God" as we understand Him. But how should we act in the face of such disturbances? Fortunately, we have instructions on what to do in such instances.

"(I)t is really easy to being the practice of Step Three," we read. "In all times of emotional disturbance or indecision, we can pause, ask for quiet, and in the stillness simply say: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference. Thy will, not mine, be done.""

[The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, pp. 40-41.]

There is nothing we can "change" in an instant other than our attitude - i.e., the level of our consciousness and thought. Thus, when disturbed we need to immediately move from the egoic resistance to life's circumstances, to higher consciousness and an acceptive, radical non-resistance to what is. ("To argue with 'what is' is insanity," said the philosopher-Emperor, Marcus Aurelius, "yet the thoughtless cannot resist doing so.")

Next, we must have the "courage" - which may only be found beyond the fear-based ego - to make the switch from egocentric to God-centric consciousness. Here, we must "take heart," which is the fundamental meaning of 'courage', a word that comes from the French and Latin word for 'heart' - 'cour.' ("Fearlessness," Gandhi observed, "is the first requirement of spirituality. A coward can never be moral.")

Lastly, we must know "the difference" between what we can and cannot change at the moment we are disturbed. It is, thus, essential that we know there is the small "self" of ego-consciousness, and the higher "Self" of God-consciousness, and that there is a vast different to the thought processes and emotional reactions of both states. For it is only in this latter 'self-less' state that we can "accept that person, place, thing, or situation" which disturbs us "as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."

At Step Three in the 'Big Book' we read:

"This is the how and why of it. First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn't work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom."

"When we sincerely took such a position, all sorts of remarkable things followed. We had a new Employer. Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter. We were reborn."

 Thus, if we ignore the "spiritual axiom" that in all instances of emotional disturbance it is we who are upset, all this falls away, and we are once again assuming sole responsibility to manage and direct a life which will immediately and rapidly spiral out of all control, resulting in emotional outbursts and actions we will later regret and have to make amends for - or it may result in much, much worse.

Smashing 'Old Ideas' and 'Attitudes'

"We 'begin' with this this now-awareness, but the beginning must be a new and genuine redetermination of Isness. We start from scratch, but this is not being done until our previous beliefs, ideas and cherished opinions are loosed and let go. The practice of humanity, the intellectual temptation, is to carry them with us to see if our new discoveries coincide with our old ideas."

"No, we let go everything and start again like new babes, with the first and basic fact about which there is no uncertainty - the Isness of this present now-awareness. All else must go. Without regard or regret, without fear or consternation, we stand in a void, naked, childlike, innocent. As this now-awareness, empty of the ego, we open our eyes and awaken."

-- William Samuel --
("A Guide to Awareness and Tranquility")

The only "absolute" in the first part of the 'Big Book' of Alcoholics Anonymous is the absolute necessity of letting go of our old ideas. "Many of us," we read in the "How It Works" chapter, "tried to hold onto our old ideas, and the result was nil until we let go absolutely." Nothing changes if our thinking does not change. Our old thought patterns must be smashed!

Indeed, that is the essence of what a spiritual awakening is. At page 27 of the 'Big Book', in describing the type of spiritual awakening that had been know to arrest chronic alcoholism, Carl Jung described how the "(i)deas, emotions and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of these men are suddenly cast to one side and new conceptions and motivations begin to dominate them." Of course, both "ideas" and "conceptions" are synonyms for thoughts, and it is thus clear that our "old ideas" must be let go of, in order for new "conceptions" to arise. And with our old "ideas" go the "emotions" that are associated with them, and suddenly (or gradually) there arises a new "attitude" or way of thinking.

Clinging to our "old ideas" impedes or totally blocks this mental transformation, and merely reinforces our calamitous ego-centric thinking. New thoughts and a new way of thinking are necessary if we are to effect and then improve a conscious contact with the God of our understanding, for it is our self-centered, fear-based ideas and attitudes (i.e., the seemingly separate and desperate human ego) that are the immediate problem of the alcoholic addict once he or she is clean and sober. Acting while reliant on our egoic self-obsessed thinking, we are bound to say or do something that blows up in our faces and thus makes drinking or drugging seem like the only option available to us. Thus Steps Four through Step Nine are designed to clear away the mental "wreckage of our past," while Steps Ten through Twelve are designed to keep our old "attitudes" or ways of thinking at bay

Freed from our old ideas - and the longer we are clean and sober, the less time it takes for an idea to get "old" - we are then able to live freely in the present moment, in what Bill describes at page 107 of The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions as "a new state of consciousness and being." It is this higher, God-consciousness (once obscured beneath our ordinary egoic self-consciousness) which spiritual teachers of all traditions attest to - the "suchness" or "Isness" of life itself as it is lived - or, as Paul described it, "the peace that surpasses all understanding."

Carl Jung on Alcoholism, Addiction and "Attitude Adjustment"

Often referred to as a program of "attitude adjustment," the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous (and its sister fellowships) were crafted to address the problem of the alcoholic addict where it centers - in his or her mind. In doing so, they are intended to address the thoughts, feelings and way of thinking that keeps the alcoholic addict in the throes of addiction, and they do so by uncovering an entirely new state of consciousness and being that exists within each of us.

"Attitude" is defined as "a settled . . . way of thinking," and it is the alcoholic addict's conditioned, or learned, "way of thinking" that must be overcome. Indeed, in describing the spiritual awakenings that had been reported as arresting chronic alcoholism, the great Swiss psychologist, Carl Jung, observed that "(the) ideas, emotions and attitudes that were the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side and a completely new set of conceptions and motivations begin to dominate them."

[Alcoholics Anonymous, page 27.]

Note how these words "ideas," "attitudes," "conceptions," etc., all deal with mental phenomena. The 12 Steps are indeed "a program of action," yet all the actions that are suggested are meant to effect a mental rearrangement by allowing the recovering alcoholic addict to tap into the stream of a different, higher state of consciousness than his or or her ordinary, egoic "self" consciousness provides. Indeed, in Jung's view, the problem of "ego," or "self" consciousness, is the central dilemma of all humanity - addict and non-addict alike - only in the alcoholic addict, if unchecked, the "ego" will inevitably lead the sufferer to drink or drug once again in order to relieve this "bondage of self." In order to overcome this dilemma, Jung saw that a spiritual (or inner religious) conversion was necessary, and that such a spiritual awakening must be one that is grounded in experiential rather than merely intellectual knowledge.

Thus, in his book, "The Undiscovered Self," Jung observes:

"Just as man, as a social being, cannot in the long run exist without a tie to the community, so the individual will never find the real justification for his existence, and his own spiritual and moral autonomy, anywhere except in an extramundane principle capable of relativizing the overpowering influence of external factors."

"The individual who is not anchored in God," Jung points out, "can offer no resistance on his own resources to the physical and moral blandishments of the world."

"For this," Jung notes, "he needs the inner, transcendent experience which alone can protect him from the otherwise inevitable submersion in the mass. Merely intellectual or even moral insight into the stultification and moral irresponsibility of the mass man is a negative recognition only and amounts to not much more than a wavering on the road to the atomization of the individual. It lacks the driving force of religious conviction, since it is merely rational."

[Jung, "The Undiscovered Self," page 34.]

Indeed, in his belated correspondence with Bill W.  - in which Bill originally thanked Jung for his initial contribution to the chain of events that would lead to the founding of A.A. - Jung observed that "the evil principle prevailing in this world leads the unrecognized spiritual need into perdition, if it is not counteracted either by real religious insight or by the protective wall of human community." The 12 Steps are thus designed to provide just such insight.

Just as "attitude" can also describe the way in which an aircraft cuts through the sky, "attitude" (or his or her way of thinking) can describe the way an individual circumnavigates life. If centered in,  and identified wholly with, his or her egoic self-consciousness, the individual is left blowing in the wind with neither guide nor plan. But the same individual, armed with real and experiential religious or spiritual insight, and experiencing life through the higher consciousness and being which exists within each of us, becomes in Jung's terms "anchored in God." The Twelve Steps are, thus, designed to spark the spiritual (or inner religious) experience that makes this rarer state of consciousness and being possible.

Step Three: "As a Man Thinketh"

"The aphorism, “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he," not only embraces the whole of a man's being, but is so comprehensive as to reach out to every condition and circumstance of his life. A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts."

  -- James Allen --    
("As A Man Thinketh")

In the 'Big Book' of Alcoholics Anonymous, we read that its principal author, Bill W., was to "test" his thinking against "God-consciousness," a new state of consciousness and being which is described in the "Spiritual Experience appendix to the 'Big Book' as "an unsuspected inner resource." For, it is only in this higher, deeper (and quieter) consciousness that we are free of the ego's inner dialogue. This, is the essence of turning one's will and one's life over to the care of one's Higher Power.

"I was to test my thinking by the new God-consciousness within," we read. "Common sense would thus become uncommon sense. I was to sit quietly when in doubt, asking only for direction and strength to meet my problems as He would have me. Never was I to pray for myself, except as my requests bore on my usefulness to others. Then only might I expect to receive. But that would be in great measure."

[Alcoholics Anonymous, page 13.]

This notion of sitting quietly "when in doubt" as to what it is one should say or do (or what one should refrain from saying or doing) is, of course, the very method that is recommended to "practice" Step Three in one's life. And it is how, through the practice of meditation (as well as prayer) that we seek to "improve our conscious contact" with the God of our understanding.

"It is when we try to make our will conform with God's that we begin to use it rightly," we read in The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. "To all of us, this was a most wonderful revelation. Our whole trouble had been the misuse of willpower. We had tried to bombard our problems with it instead of attempting to bring it into agreement with God's intention for us. To make this increasingly possible is the purpose of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, and Step Three opens the door."

"Once we have come into agreement with these ideas it is really easy to begin the practice of Step Three. In all times of emotional disturbance or indecision, we can pause, ask for quiet, and in the stillness simply say: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Thy will, not mine, be done."

[The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, pp. 40-41.]

The essence of a spiritual awakening, as Carl Jung describes it on page 27 of the 'Big Book,' is that "ideas, emotions and attitudes" that were the guiding forces of one's life are "cast aside" in favor of "new conceptions and motives." It is through the practice of  sitting quietly in meditation that we begin to "uncover, discover and discard" (in the words of the inimitable Chuck c.) the thoughts ("ideas"), feelings ("emotions") and thought patterns ("attitudes") that separate us from God-consciousness. It is by stopping and seeking God-consciousness in the midst of indecision and emotional disturbance that we hone our character and begin ridding ourselves of our character defects.

One of the books used by Doctor Bob, Bill W. and other early members of A.A. was the slim volume, "As a Man Thinketh" by the English "New Thought" writer, James Allen. In it, he observes:

"Man is made or unmade by himself. In the armory of thought he forges the weapons by which he destroys himself. He also fashions the tools with which he builds for himself heavenly mansions of joy and strength and peace. By the right choice and true application of thought, man ascends to the divine perfection. By the abuse and wrong application of thought he descends below the level of the beast. Between these two extremes are all the grades of character, and man is their maker and master."

(A copy of "As a Man Thinketh" is available, here.)

Through the consistent and continual practice of self examination, meditation and prayer, we become aware of what our thoughts are, and what emotions those thoughts spark. We also become attuned to the habitual way that we think - usually an uncomfortable realization for a newcomer to meditation. By recurrence to the state of God-consciousness, where the raucous voice of the ego is momentarily stilled, we can (as Allen notes) through "right choice and true application of thought" begin the ascent towards "divine perfection." Or, by acting indecisively and in the throes of emotional disturbance, we can again descend into, and reinforce, our egoic way of thinking and acting.

The 12 Steps are designed to help us make that choice and identification. They deliver us, as earnest application of Step Three and the Serenity Prayer will prove, "the serenity" of God-consciousness, if we have "the courage" to go beyond the ego, and we have "the wisdom" to differentiate the raucous voice of the small "self" from the peaceful and quiet consciousness of the higher "Self," or God.

Resentment: Digging One's Own Grave One 'Old Idea' at a Time

Resentment  (or 're-sentiment') is to experience all over again the feelings of anger  - towards someone, something, or some situation  - that we once felt in the past each time that we think such "old ideas" anew.  It is, we read in the 'Big Book' of Alcoholics Anonymous, the "number one" offender, and that "(i)t destroys more alcoholics than anything else," and that "(f)rom it stem all forms of spiritual disease."

"It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal. for when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die.

If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch and the brainstorm were not for us. They may be the dubious luxury of normal men, but for alcoholics, these things are poison."

[Alcoholics Anonymous, page 66.]

At the beginning of the "How It Works" chapter of the 'Big Book,' we read that "many of us tried to hold onto our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely." We cannot afford, it seems, to entertain (or hold onto) the old ideas about people, things or circumstances that still anger us. That may well be the "dubious luxury" of so-called normal people, but nothing will change for the alcoholic addict in recovery unless he or she at least tries to get rid of such old ideas. That is what Steps 4 through Step 9 are specifically designed to do.

It has been said that anger is a corrosive acid that eats away the container that holds it from the inside out. In Steps Four through Step Nine, we list discuss, forgive and make restitution in order to get rid of, or at least neutralize, those corrosive old ideas that continue to crop up as a large part of the painful inner dialogue that is our ordinary 'self' consciousness or 'ego'.

In describing the type of vital spiritual experience that can enable alcoholics to attain and maintain sobriety, Carl Jung noted that "ideas, emotions and attitudes" that are the "guiding forces" of the alcoholic addict are "cast aside." The thoughts of past, future or imagined wrongs that a person, place or circumstance brings to mind are old 'ideas'. The resentments (or 're-sentiments')  are old 'emotions'. And, our vengeful and obsessive thought patterns that are shot through with righteous (or supposedly righteous) indignation are old ''attitudes. We must be free of all these if we are to lead a spiritually awakened life.

"If a man goes out seeking revenge," the Daoists said, "he had better dig two graves." For us, to mentally turn the thoughts of what and who has offended us over and over again in the mind is to seek revenge, if only mentally. If we continue to do so instead of forgiving and making whatever restitution might be necessary to get rid of such old ideas emotions and attitudes, we are obsessively digging and perfecting that second grave.

Thus, revenge, even the imagined mental revenge that we mental 'blowhards' are prone to obsess over, is therefore not a dish best served cold, but a dish not served (or even prepared) at all. Resentments can and have killed many an alcoholic addict.

Grave Mental and Emotional Disorders: 'The AA Member, Medications & Other Drugs''

In the "How It Works" excerpt that is read to open so many A.A. meetings, we face the fact that many of us may "suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of (us) do recover if (we) have the capacity to be honest." As one who has suffered from such disorders, in sobriety, I am grateful that those words are there. And it is not surprising that they are there, considering that we know that "the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind." [Alcoholics Anonymous, page 23.]

I am also grateful that I have learned, and been shown in A.A., that an additional mental illness - in my instance depression - is no impediment to recovery if it is addressed realistically and soberly.

In fact, the doctors who I have seen to treat this additional "outside" problems have, in some instances, helped me to gain some of the greatest insights into my 'self' - which is, after all, the root cause of my alcoholism and addiction, as well as my depression. 

Indeed, I have been blessed to have a plentitude of what Bill called the "loving advisors" who helped steer him through his alcoholic addiction, as well as his own battles with chronic and lasting depression.

"Had I not been blessed with wise and loving advisers," Bill writes in the August 1961 Grapevine, "I might have cracked up long ago. A doctor once saved me from death by alcoholism because he obliged me to face up to the deadliness of that malady. Another doctor, a psychiatrist, later on helped me save my sanity because he led me to ferret out some of my deep-lying defects. From a clergyman I acquired the truthful principles by which we A.A.'s now try to live."

"But these precious friends did far more than supply me with professional skills. I learned that I could go to them with any problem whatsoever. Their wisdom and their integrity were mine for the asking."

"Many of my dearest A.A. friends have stood with me in exactly this same relation. Oftentimes they could help where others could not, simply because they were A.A.'s."

["As Bill Sees It," page 303.]

Rather than morosely seeing depression as a debilitating character defect, I have come to see it as a readily treatable condition - much like alcoholism - rather than as a moral feeling. Unlike alcoholism, however, my depression requires that I take medication on a daily basis. Like meditation and prayer - which, not uncoincidentally, are also very helpful in dealing with depression - the medication that I take is, for me, a necessity and not a crutch.

Having had the chance to share my experience in dealing with one of the "grave mental and emotional disorders" which others in the program also struggle with, I have found that reading and understanding our pamphlet on "The AA Member - Medications & Other Drugs" is invaluable.  I am not a doctor, and as just another 'alky' (albeit with a concurrent illness), I would not dream of sharing my "medical expertise" with an  alcoholic who is a fellow member of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Fortunately, the "Other Medications" pamphlet contains a report from a group of physicians in A.A. that the General Service Conference approved, presumably, for use in just such instances. At the beginning of the pamphlet it states the following:

"The experience of some A.A. members reveals that drug misuse can threaten the achievement and maintenance of sobriety."

"Yet some A.A. members must take prescribed medication in order to treat certain serious medical problems."

"Experience has shown that this problem can be minimized if the following suggestions are carefully heeded:

1. Remember that as a recovering alcoholic your automatic response will be to turn to chemical relief for uncomfortable feelings and to take more than the usual, prescribed amount. Look for nonchemical solutions for the aches and discomforts of everyday living.
2. Remember that the best safeguard against drug-related relapse is an active participation in the A.A. program of recovery.
3. No A.A. Member Plays Doctor.
4. Be completely honest with yourself and your physician regarding use of medication.
5. If in doubt, consult a physician with demonstrated experience in the treatment of alcoholism.
6. Be frank about your alcoholism with any physician or dentist you consult. Such confidence will be respected and is most helpful to the doctor.
7. Inform the physician at once if you experience side effects from prescribed drugs.
8. Consider consulting another doctor if a personal physician refuses or fails to recognize the peculiar susceptibility of alcoholics to sedatives, tranquilizers, and stimulants.
9. Give your doctor copies of this pamphlet.

"Because of the difficulties that many alcoholics have with drugs," the pamphlet continues (at page 13), "some members have taken the position that no one in A.A. should take any medication. While this position has undoubtedly prevented relapses for some, it has meant disaster for others."

"A.A. members and many of their physicians," it further continues, "have described situations in which depressed patients have been told by A.A.s to throw away the pills, only to have depression return with all its difficulties, sometimes resulting in suicide."

As a member who has come all-too-close to suicide in sobriety let me be brutally honest with you. If an A.A. member gives such advice to another member, he or she is self-centeredly playing with that person's life. If the advice is given to you - even by your sponsor - ignore it and talk to your doctor about it. If you hear another person giving such advice, intervene. You may save that person's life.

Remember, as the pamphlet stresses in capitals: No A.A. Member Plays Doctor!

But also remember that, thank God, there are many "wise and loving advisers" we can turn to - inside and outside the program for help with any of the difficulties we may face in life. We are "no longer alone," nor need we be.

From "Grave Mental and Emotional Disorders" to "Emotional Sobriety"

One of Bill W.'s most self-revelatory writings, a letter he wrote to a close friend who also suffered from bouts of depression, was published in the January 1958 issue of the Grapevine under the title "Emotional Sobriety: The Next Frontier." It's also published at page 236 in "The Language of the Heart," and is essential reading if you or anyone you know suffers, as I have done, from what Winston Churchill called "the black dog" of periodic depression.

In it, Bill notes that "many oldsters who have put our 'booze cure' to severe but successful tests still find that they often lack emotional sobriety. Perhaps," he suggests, "they will be the spearhead for the next major development in AA - the development of much more real maturity and balance (which is to say humility) in our relations with ourselves, with our fellows, and with God."

He continues:

"Those adolescent urges that so many of us have for top approval, perfect security, and perfect romance - urges quite appropriate to age seventeen - prove to be an impossible way of life when we are at age forty-seven or fifty-seven."

"Since AA began, I've taken immense wallops in all these areas because of my failure to grow up, emotionally and spiritually. God, how painful it is to keep demanding the impossible, and how very painful to discover, finally, that all along we have had the cart before the horse! Then comes the final agony of seeing how awfully wrong we have been, but still finding ourselves unable to get off the emotional merry-go-round."

"How to translate a right mental conviction into a right emotional result, and so into easy, happy, and good living - well, that's not only the neurotic's problem, it's the problem of life itself for all of us who have got to the point of real willingness to hew to the right principles in all our affairs."

"My basic flaw," Bill confesses, "had always been dependence - almost absoulute dependence - on people or circumstances to supply me with prestige, security and the like. Failing to get these things according to my perfectionist dreams and specifications, I had fought for them. And when defeat came, so did my depression."

Our stories, "before and after," we repeatedly hear in the "How It Works" reading, makes clear the idea that "we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives." I have found that my dependence on being able to manage my life so that I received what I thought I needed as far as security, love and social standing with my fellows turned out, as it did for Bill, to end in crushing disappointments and the very real, grave and life-threatening onset of depression. However, when I have truly surrendered the management of life to the source that already controls it - surrendered life to life itself - I have found that my dependencies and my depression recede, and that I have those precious commodities I need to sustain me, the experience of a loving God-consciousness and the serenity of emotional sobriety.

This is not to say that the alcoholic addict who suffers or suspects he or she may suffer from depression should not see a medical professional. Quite the contrary. AA has "no opinion" on that issue, as is noted in "The A.A, Member and Other Medications," pamphlet. However, it must also be noted that our experience (as set out in the pamphlet) is that if a person requires medication and is not taking that medication, this may prevent him or her from having the spiritual awakening that is necessary to arrest his or her active addiction.

That being said, Bill notes that he found the beginning of a solution to his grave emotional problem with depression in realizing he could not be both dependent on others and reliant upon God to meet his true needs:

"Plainly," he observes, "I could not avail myself of God's love until I was able to offer it back to him by loving others as he would have me. And I couldn't possibly do that so long as I was victimized by false dependencies."

"For my dependency meant demand - a demand for the possession and control of the people and the conditions surrounding me."

In my instance, the problem and the results were the same. With the aid of appropriate medication (carefully prescribed and monitored by my doctor), and the admixture of the "self-examination, meditation and prayer," that was similarly recommended to me, I can truly let go of my dependency for people to conform with my ideas of how life should be 'managed,' and accede to the way that God manages life - all of life - and always has.

Of course, as it is recognized, I first had to be honest and willing to face the reality of how I had I subtly tried to manage life myself. This was the honesty and humility I needed to cope with depresssion - a "grave mental and emotional disorder" which can be overcome if I manifest my God-given capacity to be honest with myself.

Stuck 'In a Rut' of Old Ideas, Emotions and Attitudes

Most of us have, at some time or other, been 'in a rut' in our sobriety. Going to meetings reluctantly and critically, not going to meetings, sober and self-satisfied with merely being sober, entertaining old ideas, we can go on day by day spinning our wheels spiritually, and thus digging ourselves a deeper rut.

In various stages of my early and middle sobriety I have been guilty of all of these "half-measures" and have suffered (and inflicted suffering on others, including those I love the most) as a result.

Indeed, looking back, I came very close to both drinking and drugging, as well as dieing, as a result of being in various of these 'ruts.' For as the novelist, Ellen Glasgow observed, "The only difference between a rut and a grave are the dimensions."

At such times, it is essential to remember the first, most important, and ultimate lesson about recovery from an alcoholic addiction, the message that Carl Jung passed on to his one-time patient, a "certain American businessman," named Rolland Hazard:

"Here and there, once in a while, alcoholics have had what are called vital spiritual experiences. To me these occurrences are phenomena. They appear to be in the nature of huge emotional displacements and rearrangements. Ideas emotions and attitudes which were once the guiding force of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them."

["Alcoholics Anonymous," page 27. Emphasis added.]

Hazard would pass this message on to Ebby Thatcher, who would come to be the sponsor of a then-drunk named Bill Wilson. Bill, in turn, would have just such a "vital spiritual experience," and would pass the message of his experience on to A.A. co-founder, Dr. Bob, and together they would carry this message to the world.

Thus, the question to ask for the sufferer stuck in his or her 'rut,' is whether their spirtual experience remains "vital" Is it "essential to (their) existing or functioning," "indisspensable" or "paramount" to use just a few simple dictionary definitions of "vital"?  If the sufferer is no longer "full of life or activity" and "lively" - to utilize another definition - the chances are he or she has slipped back into a 'rut' filled with old thoughts, feelings, and ways of thinking, and that he or she has once again picked up the old "ideas, emotions and attitudes," which had once been cast aside.

Remember: the only 'absolute' that is mentioned in the first 164 pages of the 'Big Book' of Alcoholics Anonymous comes in the "How It Works" reading, taken from the fifth chapter of the 'Big Book.' In it, we read: "Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely."

The initials 'A.A.' have often been said to stand for an "attitude adjustment," and, quite simply, an "attitude" is defined as "a setttled opinion or way of thinking," as well as "behaviour reflecting this." When we become judgmental about what is being said in a meeting, about how others are driving in traffic, about the words and actions of our loved ones or perfect strangers, it is a sure sign that our old "attitudes" or ways of thinking have returned - along with our old "ideas" - and that we are holding on to them.

And the result will be nil - we will be just as "irritable, restless and discontented" as any other alcoholic addict not drinking or drugging - until we again try to let go of such "old ideas."

"It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels," we are warned, and "(w)e are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition."

[Alcoholics Anonymous, page 85.]

A large part of that "daily maintenance" - referred to in Step 11 of the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions as "self-examination" - is guarding against letting "old ideas" fester in our consciousness. And let's face it, the longer one is sober, the quicker the ideas we mull over in our mind become "old."

"Old ideas" are like Wrigley's chewing gum. Chew on them for a while, but they quickly lose their taste and appeal, and its then time to spit them out, not swallow them. Prayer and meditation make that possible.

Surrender Part II: Letting Go & Letting God

"When we became alcoholic, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is or He isn't. What was our choice to be?

["Alcoholics Anonymous," page 53.]

Paris Peace Conference, 1919

The First World War (which was known as "the Great War," because it was assumed to be 'the war to end all wars') ended in an armistice or truce, and not a surrender. Afterwards, the representatives of 29 countries met in Pais and hammered out a number of treaties (the "Paris Peace Treaties") that imposed conditions on the defeated nations, including crippling war reparations, that virtually assured that the peace wouldn't last. It didn't.

During the course of the ensuing Second Word War, the leaders of the main Allied Powers met and decided their would only be one condition for ending the war, that being the "unconditional surrender" of the Axis Powers (principally Germany, Italy and Japan).

Japan's "Unconditional Surrender," 1945

It's been said, that Japan, in particular, as the last combatant to surrender, faced the toughest conditions of all in implementing its "unconditional surrender," Their emperor, considered a living God by the people of Japan, had to go on the radio (in itself unheard of) and admit defeat; all of Japan's weapons were then inventoried and turned over to its former enemies; a new constitution was written for it by the Allied Powers (including a provision that it would never rearm); and those leaders that had led Japan into war (who hadn't killed themselves) were tried and executed.

And what was the result? Aid flowed into Germany and Japan as part of the Marshall Plan, and within scant years, each was amongst the richest and most productive economies in the world, and they in turn became not only functioning democracies, but trusted and crucial allies of their former enemies.

Admitting complete defeat, and the unconditional surrender of the right to manage and care for one's own life, is, of course what is necessary for one to enjoy the full promise that the 12 Steps hold out to the newcomer.

"Who cares to admit complete defeat?"

"Who cares to admit complete defeat?," we read in the opening chapter of the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. An admission of complete defeat, we read, is necessary because, "We perceive that it is only through utter defeat (that we are) able to take our first steps towards liberation and strength." Like Germany and Japan, we are asked to make an unconditional surrender, in order to access the help that A.A. and its sister programs so gladly offer. ("The war is over," as my first sponsor's sponsor so often said "And the good news is . . . you lost," he always added.)

Then, if we can answer this call for an "unconditional surrender" in the affirmative, we face a number of interrelated questions that are really a subset of that first and all-important questions as to whether we are completely defeated, have "hit bottom," and have admitted that we are "powerless over alcohol" and that "our lives have become unmanageable."

" . . . (F)ew people," we read, " will sincerely try to practice the A.A. Program unless they have hit botton. For practicing A.A.'s remaining eleven Steps means the adoption of attitudes and actions that almost no alcoholic who is still drinking can dream of taking. Who wishes to be honest and tolerant? Who wants to confess his faults to another and make restitution for harm done? Who cares anything about a Higher Power, let alone meditation and prayer? Who wants to sacrifice time and energy in trying to carry A.A.'s message to the next sufferer? No, the average alcoholic, self-centered in the extreme, doesn't care for this prospect - unless he has to do these things in order to stay alive himself."

If we can answer these questions in the affirmative, then we are truly in a position to finally let go of our old ideas and attitudes (our old thoughts and ways of thinking) in order to let that "unsuspected inner resource," which we all have, guide our thoughts and our actions.  (See the Spiritual Experience appendix.)

Yet a lifetime of desperately trying to manage the unmanageable - i.e., trying to manage life - is going to be a hard habit to kick. And, so, Step Three is all about the practice of letting go of our need to act upon the first fear-driven thoughts that pop into our heads, and in relying upon the deeper God-inspired thoughts of our higher consciousness to guide our words and actions.

"It is when we try to make our will conform with God's that we begin to use it rightly," we read in Step Three of the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. "To all of us, this was a most wonderful revelation. Our whole trouble had been the misuse of will power. We had tried to bombard our problems with it instead of trying to bring it into agreement with God's intention for us. To make this increasingly possible is the purpose of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, and Step Three opens the door."

The "whole purpose of A.A.'s Twelve Steps" is to get us to exercise our will in conformity with God's will? That is a powerful statement. And, if God is indeed "everything" rather than "nothing," as we read at page 53 in the 'Big Book' of Alcoholics Anonymous, this must mean that we have to bring our will into conformity with the will of the Whole, with the will of "life" itself. That's a tall order. How is it possible?

Thankfully, each of us has a conscience - and are capable of being conscious of that conscience - and, therefore, each time we are about to say something or do something (or refrain from doing or saying something) that will bring us into conflict with the will of the Whole (or the will of God), we are capable of feeling the pangs of conscience. as expressed in our emotions .

In such instances, we will feel wounded pride, greedy, angry, lustful, gluttonous, envious, or tired and slothful, to utilize the range of emotions that go along with the "seven deadly sins" that are discussed later in the Twelve and Twelve. In short, we will again begin to suffer the pangs of "anxious apartness" that arises each time the "self" (or the"ego") feels threatened and seemingly needs to express itself in action or words. And that's where the rest of the "practice" of Step Three kicks in.

At the very end of Step Three in the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, we read that it is, indeed "easy to begin the practice" of Step Three," for it very much a spiritual practice which is every bit as important to our long-term recovery as is our meditation practice, or our practice of taking a daily inventory. It is through this Third Step "practice," that in each time of "emotional disturbance or indecision, we can pause, ask for silence, and in the stillness" recite the Serenity Prayer.

For it is only in the deeper, higher consciousness of the "God of our own understanding" that serenity is to be found. It is only in going to this deeper, higher consciousness, that we become able to display the "courage" to change the only "thing" that we can - that is, the level of our consciousness. And, it is only in knowing that there is within us each the lower, normal self-consciousness of the human ego, and the higher, deeper consciousness of God, that we begin to actually display "wisdom."

In short, it is in making our decisions about what to say or do (or not say or do) based on this higher, deeper God-consciousness that we begin the practice of "letting go" of our egoic, self-consciousness, and "letting (the) God" of our higher consciousness run the show.

Life is, in fact, unmanageable by our lower, egoic "selves;" and, yet, it requires no management when we are attuned in consciousness to the Higher Power of the Whole, the Ground of Being, or just simply, God. "The war is over," then. "And the good news is . . . you lost!"

Carl Jung and Alcoholics Anonymous: Part I

The only place where an "absolute" is mentioned in the first half of the 'Big Book' of Alcoholics Anonymous is in the introductory remarks about our "old ideas" in the "How It Works" chapter - right there in the paragraph immediately before the 'suggested' Twelve Steps are laid out.

"Many of us have tried to hold onto our old ideas," we are cautioned each time the "How It Works passage is read out, "but the result was nil until we let go absolutely." Nothing changes. We remain just as "restless, irritable and discontented" as we were before we took that last 'first drink' for just as long as we try to hang on to our old mental life.

But why are our "old ideas" flagged as the only aspect of our former lives that we must let go of lock, stock and barrel - or  "absolutely"? The answer, it seems, like so much else - indeed, the entire Twelve Steps movement - has its "taproot" in the work of the psychologist Carl Jung with a single patient, Roland Hazzard. Roland would go on to join the Oxford Group, find a "solution" to his alcoholic addiction, and pass the message of recovery on to Ebby T. who passed the message on to Bill Wilson. And getting rid of "old ideas" is at the heart of the message which Roland indirectly passed on to Bill W.

The crux of the message was that a sufficiently forceful - or "vital" - "spiritual experience" could arrest an almost always fatal alcoholic addiction:

"Here and there, once in a while, alcoholics have had what are called vital spiritual experiences. To me these occurrences are phenomena. They appear to be in the nature of huge emotional displacements and rearrangements. Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them."

("Alcoholics Anonymous," page 27; emphasis added.)

"What man by taking thought ever
added one moment to his life span?"
(Matthew 6:27)

The setting aside of "old ideas," together with the emotional content of those thoughts and our habitual process of how we think (our "attitudes") is the spiritual experience we need to arrest our alcoholism and recover. It is the setting aside of "old ideas" that creates within us the "open mind" uncluttered by egoic thinking and by the "calamity, pomp and worship of other things ("Big Book,' page 55) that separate us from the "Great Reality deep down within us." It is the setting aside of "old ideas" that reveals to us "the unsuspected inner resource" ('Big Book' Spiritual Experience appendix) which almost without exception early A.A. members identified with "their own conception of a Power greater than themselves."

We utilize the 12 Steps and its suggested program of "self examination, meditation and prayer" to rid our 'selves' of our 'selves' in essence. Through this process, the "ideas, emotions and attitudes' of our ordinary, egoic 'self-consciousness' are suddenly (or gradually) replaced with a 'higher consciousness,' or what the "more religious" early A.A. members called "God-consciousness," which brings with it a "whole new mindset of "conceptioins and motivations'" according to Jung.

That attainment of this 'higher consciousness' is sufficient to arrest and treat an alcoholic addiction is "no coincidence," Jung would much later point out in a prized letter to Bill W. In the Jung-Wilson correspondence (discussed in Part II of this article) Jung notes that, "Alcohol in Latin is "spiritus" and you use the same word for the highest religious [or spiritual] experience as well as for the most depraving poison. The helpful formula therefore is: spiritus contra spiritum."

However, in order for us to follow this formula, we must continually strive to rid ourselves of the ego and its old ideas, even as they continually arise in us through our egoic streams of consciousness. And, it is in this process of "self-forgetting" that we let go of ego-consciousness and so establish or re-establish our conscious contact with an 'understandable' God within our Being.

And, it is in this continual "self-forgetting" of the 11th Step Prayer that "we find" a higher consciousness and Jung's "new conceptions and motivations" despite the challenge of doing so. Because, let's face it, after several minutes of our egos chewing on it, virtually any thought will begin to grow old and stale.

(Click, here, for "Carl Jung and Alcoholics Anonymous: Part II")